BITCH GET FESTIVUS!

Nothing says Christmas like an ostrich in McQueen tartan, carrying turtle doves. Oui? Non? Or maybe the Christmas PSA here is to learn from our beloved ostrich and adopt a few of their instinctual habits.

The first is to hide or lie flat against the ground when threatened. This is probably a good technique during the later hours of the 24th or early morning on the 25th. The second is that ostriches will kick when they are cornered. I see this move making its debut later in the evening of the 25th. Or we can just do the most famous ostrich pop and lock freestyle move of them all and stick our heads in the sand, or in the snow ... whatever suits your geographical fetish or mainstay.

Of course these are just in emergency situations. For the rest of us, I recommend a good Hendricks to go with our festive tartan.

Truthfully, I will be fully immersed the land of It's A Wonderful Life.

If you haven't seen this movie, or assume you won't like it, I will now encourage you to wake the fa la la la la up! It is beautiful and brilliant. If you have seen it, and you don't like it, perhaps you haven't got much of a pulse, and you don't much care for Twain either ... and your probably opt for Egg Nog lite, or even worse, you don't even like Egg Nog. If this is you, write me and as a NLX-mas courtesy, I will send you a leg lamp.

Happy Holidays my little Ho Ho Hos!

Big Love!

NLX-mas

p.s. And for all you lonely hearts out there ... have hope ... 2010 is just around the bend.